So much reflection. So little time...

How is it almost March already? I swear to God when I think about it, this year has gone by in a blink. But then if I slow it down, and remember all the amazing things I've done this past year- it feels like a lifetime of memories.

So lets paint a little picture for you, Im surrounded by piles of clothes and boxes, with a mere 6 days left in Australia before they kick me out of this beautiful place. I cant believe ive come this far and I am incredibly proud of myself that I have. When shit got real, my travelling buddy left, money was dwindling away and jobs were few and far between- I almost gave up hope to come home. But I'm so glad I didnt. I managed to bag an amazing job, talking to like minded people (backpackers) all day long, and doing a job they are grateful for you doing. I couldnt of asked for a better working environment. The girls in the office crack me up- and although Ive only been there a short while I wish I could of stayed longer.

But alas onwardsand upwards- or is it sidewards? Next stop- New Zealand! I have called Australia home for the past year- with Australian people infuriating me and inspiring me all at the same time. Their love of running, fruit juices, bbqs, beers, beetroot, avocado, soccer, cricket- in fact any sport going...their open honest nature, ignorant pride and friendlyness to strangers on the street- I miss truely miss it all. I hope to carry a little bit of ozzie back with me to England, to be less angry about life, to be more charitable and kind...and just simply have "no worries or dramas"

And this journey To New Zealand will be solo. And good for me. A month of discovering myself all over again. To soak up that serenity! To make new friends and new memories. I can safely say this with pure clarity- if i was to get run over by a bus tomorrow, I wouldnt want anyone to be sad. Ive lived my life. Ive done it to the fullest. Ive made my ultimate dreams come true- so anything after this chapter of my life will just be a pleasurable bonus :)

So this is how the poor people live...

Bit of a contrast from my last blog but I think people will be secretly pleased its not all rainbows and butterflies living in another country...

So I started the fundraising and then quit after 4 hours. Shocking I know. Never really one to quit a job but I was fooling myself into thinking I could still do fundraising. A big pat on the back for myself for lasting 6 months of it in the toughest city to get money from, but when your working on the street, in Melbournes unpredictable weather, no uniform and just a folder, you start to lose the belief you can do it. Its mentally exhausting.

So back to square one, broke and unemployed. At the moment ive joined a temping agency in hospitality and hopefully will have some shifts by this week. Finally moved out of the hostel into a place down Brunswick Street...which to all you people back home I guess its like a really cool sunny version of Camden? Plenty of vintage shops and cute restaurants, bars and cafes. The boys and I are living above a Thai restaurant, where for 2 nights a week I work in the kitchen for free food and accommodation. Its not a job but more like slave labour lol. Its good in the sense that I am quickly becoming a masterchef of thai food and learning about different spices and stuff. But its bad in the sense that if i was being "paid" it works out to be $10 an hour. And it resembles a thai version of Faulty Towers. The thai couple are incredibly lovely though! The husband works at the bar and likes to get drunk whilst taking orders, which results in us cooking meals that nobody ordered in the first place. I just have to remember to laugh, rather than get stressed...

So fingers crossed ill be slowly but surely getting there...still yet to explore the sights of Melbourne due to lack of funds but this is all part of the journey I suppose! Just have to remain positive Ill get some work and things will start falling into place.

In the mean time were off out with the flatmates to a place called "Lentils as anything"....a place that relies purely on donation for a buffet of vegan and lentil food. Some people don't even pay! Ill put a couple of dollars in ;)

Oh herro Melbourne...

So, Ive arrived!

And Im very pleased to announce Im still alive. After arriving Tuesday evening to the infamous Elephant Backpackers I was dubious as to whether I wouldnt die in this hostel. But the room mates are friendly enough and my days have been filled with drinking to the early hours, waking up heading to the beach for a bbq and carry on drinking. My brain is officially frazzled.

But im pretty proud of myself, when I got on that plane and touched down in Melbourne I was filled with nerves. I never travelled alone, could I do this? But as soon as I got on that coach to the city, the sky filled with a beautiful pink sky as the sunset over the city skyline I couldnt help but smile. I was here! On my own! I was living the dream of so many peoples envy...of COURSE I could do this!

And Melbourne quite thankfully has welcomed me with open arms. Wednesday morning I has an interview and was offered a job on the spot. Although it was commission based I figured I could do it until I found something better. Still determined to have my options I abuse my Melbourne contacts for work and thanks to a friend of a friend I bag an interview in the afternoon and offered another job on the spot! Luckily its another fundraising gig and something I actually wanted to do! So I start with them tomorrow...

In the meantime my sydney boys have just arrived, so were off to do some exploring together. Loving life!

An end of an era...

So in a few hours time I'll be making my way to the airport. Onto my next adventure in life...

But before that I think its only fair to reflect on my time Ive had in Sydney.

When I first arrived here all fresh faced and travelled out with my fellow travelling buddy our plans were simple..to live in Manly, get a job in a bar or cafe near the beach for 6 months then move onto Melbourne...

Turns out our planning sucks lol. After going for an interview to do fundraising I didnt think much of it. I figured whatever job gets thrown my way Ill do it until I find something better. So when I got that phonecall saying I got the job with 2evolve, I figured it was only temporary.

Who knew it would end up being something thats changed me for the rest of my life?

Working for Make a Wish was a real eye opener. I quickly made friends with the 2evolve gang and I have many memories with them to last a life time. I was lucky enough to be sent to random places in Australia I would never of considered going with some of the best people Ill ever meet.

I was offered a more pernament role with them and as much as i loved the job and was truely lucky to be given the opportunity to stay. I knew in my heart it was never my intention to stay in Oz...and the stress of the job took its toll on my health more than once. So I knew it was best to move on...

So what did i move on to? Not a lot. The time was coming up where some of the best people ive met were either moving back to england or carrying on travelling. I knew it was time to bite the bullet and do something with my own life..

That doesnt mean to say I wont miss a few things....Shelly Beach, hanging out in Manly cooking a bbq on the beach and chilling out, the fine cuisine of Sydney...Korean, Vietnamese, Italian...n2 gelato!!! Blue mountains hiking...Hunter Valley weekend...Kiama...Sydney Opera house...getting lost in Paddys Market...travel trips to central coast and gold coast...chilling with my roommate watching trashy tv and discussing the drama that is our love lives... Aurora...god even scruffy murphys! that shithole has caused me more harm than good, and yet ill miss it... Ill miss it all cause its been spent with the people I love.

But now my bags are packed (and theyre bloody heavy- how have i collected so much shit since travelling?) and its time to say goodbye to Sydney. It really has been a home away from home, but now I need that feeling...the nervous excitement of getting lost in another city. Of meeting new people to call friends. Of taking pictures with a different background. Its time to spread my wings.

So to all my friends in Sydney...you know who you are. Thank you. Thank you for making these past 8 months incredible for me.

Haven't done this in a while..

How is it November already? So I've been living in Sydney Australia for almost 8 months now.

And now...It's time for a change.

Truth be told Sian and I's original plan was to do 6 months in Sydney then 6 months in Melbourne. But well...Sian left and I got caught up too much in the Sydney lifestyle...

But this is now...my third week of unemployment. After working for 2evolve everythings sort of gone pear shaped. I was glad for the less stressful life, but the dread of finding another job and somewhere to live in Sydney again was daunting. Still I manage to walk into one job...a job which destroyed my soul...and after 8 days of working I got fired. Turns out selling penis medication just wasn't my calling in life.

But after that I suppose my confidence has been knocked a bit. So this time to sit and reflect on what to do has helped me heaps. Here I am in AUSTRALIA. This is a ONCE in a lifetime thing. I should be grabbing every moment possible! And yet for some reason I felt stuck, that Sydney has become too much of a routine for me. And the thought of coming home and somebody asking me "So...where did you go in Oz?" And for me to only say...well apart from travelling the east coast I mainly stayed in Sydney. Just doesnt cut it for me. Im the girl who has always wanted more in life. Even when Ive been given Planet Earth, I still want Pluto.

So I've decided to make the jump to Melbourne. Where the weather is shitter but the guys are hotter. Where every alleyway takes you to a world of graffitti and fine dining. Although I will always feel like Sydney is my home, lately I just found myself fed up. Im fed up of people leaving me. Im fed up of hearing everyone elses exciting stories of travelling and im left doing...well what? Nothing. There is nothing keeping me here in Sydney. I have no job...I have no great love affair...least not one I care to talk about anyway...and my friends, least my true friends...are leaving in the matter of weeks. I cant be the one left stuck here. I have to keep moving. And yes its bloody scary me doing this by myself. But Its incredible how much ive changed over the past 10 months, so this will be really good for me.

And its exciting to know what I want out of life when I get back home. I want to work in charity, I want to help people, I want to wake up and go to work knowing today I will have made some sort of difference. Thats what was missing from me for all those years, every day when i woke up going in work for retail and having a heavy heart, having people make you feel like your just not good enough to do anything and the thought of not being good enough to put an outfit on a mannequin...was heartbreaking. I couldnt go back to it, knowing what I know and feel now. My life wants so much more than that.

And its not just my career, i want MORE from my life...I want to live it! I want to start saving for a house, my little house, where each room will be decorated with things from my travels, a constant reminder of how amazing my journey has been. I want to DO things over the weekend. I want to explore europe, join races for charity, take up photography, get a dog, maybe even find a man who wants all the same things as me, but if i dont. Thats okay. As much as i enjoy the male attention Ive always been my happiest when ive been by myself....its such an invigorating feeling.

So my journey is almost over. I cannot wait for the last 4 months of my time in Australia. People think im insane to not do farming work and extend my visa, and maybe theyre right. But i know in my heart ive made the right choice. No matter where I am in the world, the thing that excites me the most is seeing my friends and family for the first time in about 18 months. To laugh with them every day. To be apart of their lives again. Thats what matters most to me.

So heres to the next chapter. Sydney has been such an amazing part of my life, and Im really sad to leave but I know its the right thing to do...

An incredibly overdue blog....

As a certain American pointed out via email the other day this blog has been severely neglected. And he's right. Truth be told ive been use to putting up the odd Facebook status as a form of update, but reading back on these blogs I've realized that this is far more important. Not just for everyone to see what I've been up to...but for my own benefit. To remember this is where I'm having the time of my life. The point where I'm free to do whatever I want to do and see and one day I'll show my grand kiddies is....that's if computers and websites like this exist in later generations but whatever.

So my last blog I was just about to start my job with make a wish foundation, and what a journey it's been since then! I can honestly say its been a real eye opener, to work for a company that praises and progresses you so quickly. It's safe to say I can never go back into working for retail ever again.

In my first month of working for these guys I was promoted twice and have been living the life of a shift leader. Since then the company has sent me to various parts of Australia. It sounds glamorous...and sometimes it is, best part was being sent to Melbourne for 10 days to help the Team  down there, and over the weekend exploring the city. Or being left down in the gold coast for an extra day to explore. The company really looks after you. But there are times when the job can make you feel like the shittest person in the world....the days were the weather is shit, your in a bad location, your way behind target and people are just awful to you. It can take its toll. But I just have to remember its all for a good cause and every penny counts towards my next big trip!

Recently I've been moved over to help out another charity, cancer council. It's really hard hitting because a lot of people know this charity well and I have a lot of Aussies come up to me thanking me for doing a good job cause cancer council looked after them/ a family member. But I think the point of moving me to do a different charity is to see if I'm capable of making numbers in any charity, which could eventually lead to another promotion. Although my time with this company ends in October so that's a story that will have to remain a mystery for now....

But my time in Sydney has been amazing! July was a month of pure excitement, weekend in melbourne exploring the graffiti lanes, kiama pier and chaper street....weekend after road tripping with the contiki crew to kiama...weekend after that the infamous wine weekend away to hunter valley. Staying in a swanky Villa, drinking wine and exploring the lush greenery. The month of August is less adventurous as I'm usually on a lot of travel trips for work. But ill be checking out the blue mountains for a good hiking trip. I'll be video blogging that for everyone's amusement back at home, the 1000 step challenge! Other than that not much is planned, the wife is I regret to say leavin australia. She's traveling as I type this now. Her journey has come to an end and she's happy to go home. So many memories has been shared with this girl, I know a big part of me is gonna feel at a loss when she leaves, but luckily I've made some really good friends here to support me when she goes.

My living situation has changed, I was living with a crazy German girl. For three months of my life i had the awful feeling every time I finished work that I had to go home....but now thanks to a very supportive friend, I'm staying on her sofa for the time being. She's only charging me incredibly cheap rent and we get on amazingly so I feel a lot happier to call this place  home.

Today I'veplanning my next big trip, it's not for another 7 months but I'm super stoked already. North and south tour of new zealand, Hawaii and then a road trip of the dirty south of America. After that I should be pretty poor and ready to come home but again that side of the story will remain a mystery.

So that's my life so far folks, feeling pretty down I don't have the money to jet off now, but I only have 7 months f my visa left in oz, and I only get this once so I may as well make the most of it! I thought I'd move down to Melbourne for 6 months but most of my friends are here and I feel sort of settled. But we never know! That's the beauty of having my life, it can go in any direction, and only I can choose where I'll go next.

A reflective blog if you will...

So just having a mundane day of uploading my pictures from Asia and it just occured to me...before I left on this trip, I was all set to do 2 months in asia, a year in sydney and then come back home. With the slight chance i'll catch NZ on the way back. Now it feels like I may never come home...

Okay let me rephrase that...so much has happened in the past 4 months, and yet somehow i feel like its just the beginning. Like the whole entirety of my trip planned actually isnt enough for me. I want more. I want to see more, i want to do more and i never want to come home with the feeling that I didnt do or see it all.

If i came home now, i know most my friends would assure me ive done more than anyone would of done in a lifetime, but somehow I wouldnt buy it. So thats why im gonna work my butt off at this job, to worki my way up, to stay the full year, to go see the sights of NZ and fiji...to work in NZ for a few months maybe, to fly over to the states and have a road trip with my american boy because you know what? That, for me is what lifes all about. Its not about the final picture, about what Ill eventually end up doing, where eventually ill end up settling down...its about the journey there. The ride inbetween. So fuck settling down for now...this may seem like an immature state of mind to be in for most people...but i like to see it as smugly enjoying the way of the world because Im as free as a bird. :)

So i start my job tomorrow, I am now an official employee of Make an Wish. In other words, i bug the crap out of people to sign up on the streets. Yep ive become the people i avoided like the plague originally. But you know what? Ive never been so excited to be apart of this. If i can do this job, and do it well, i could literally be changing peoples lives. So no matter how much abuse I get tomorrow, i just have to remember its all for a good cause.

Now all i need is a place to live! Wish me luck!