Sunglasses...

So it's been a while since I've cursed the goings on in this world. Maybe it's my disgustingly happy mood lately that's cursed me with my lack of sarcasm. But fear not kiddlywinks, no matter how blissful one's life can get, there are always some things in life that should be addressed and dismissed from humanity.

Sunglasses. A fancy piece of device to protect our eyeballs from that ball of fire in the sky. Fashion comes in many forms, and so do these bad boys. From aviators to heart shape, some may say they're a necessity in life. For those morning hangovers or days at festivals were you don't give a fuck what you look like, the shaded companion will never let you down.

But there is just one tiny thing I would like to address. If the sun is shining outside in that big blue sky...then why for the love of god are you WEARING YOUR GLASSES INDOORS?

Funnily enough, you're not superman, you can't see through roofs and your eyeballs will not suffer from UV rays with a building over your head. So please, you must know if your wearing shades indoors, you look like an absolute ponce.

And don't give me any excuse of morning hangovers like I've said a few paragraphs ago. You look like a prick. Please do us all a favour, and yourself and place those shiny pretty things on top of your head before entering inside.

It's not hard, and you may even help the environment for reminding us you are not a twat.

Thank you.

Advertising..

As I'm pondering on my lazy day, the telly blares out advert after advert that usually doesn't affect me whatsoever. 

Until this "Pringles advert brings you the VOTED best snack of the year"

Im sorry, what?

Who the HELL decides what the best snack of the year is? Is there some fat bloke sitting at home, filling out questionnaires with one hand and munching every flavour of Walkers with the other as part of his career? Some career. 

Fucking adverts.

Hmm.

You know what?

This blog HAD intentions to flex my journalistic lingo, and yet what a shocker it's becoming a self indulgent rant of my social entities.

If you can't beat em...

ANYWHO, I wanted to share my views on the world through my own articles, but I also want to write something a little bit personal every day. So if an idea pops up in my head then FINE it'll be faster on here than you can say butt-kiss.

Until then I'd just like to share just a piece of my noggin with the world, because that's what helps me sleep at night. Not knowing that one day people believe we will finally have world peace, but what I'm having for breakfast tomorrow. Unless something happens in your own back yard don't rant to me that I don't care. I just pretend it's not happening.

So the topic that has been grating my cheddar these past few days is judgement. Who gets to judge in this world, why were judged and who deserves a second chance.

I'm not a very wise person, I have made my mistakes many a times when it comes to guys. But picture this please if you will.

A friend you know has a rather seedy background when it comes to men, a bit of a floozey past one might say. So when you hear a rumour about her that she's done the dirty with someone in a bit of a desperate manner, you couldn't help but believe that rumour right? After all giving her past reputation this rumour is a walk in a park to her and a bit of banter to the rest of the world.

But stop! Think.

Now imagine your that girl. Every day you live, you live with your regrets. Sometimes the things you've done in the past are funny to yourself and others. After all your young right? You have to live a little. But soon that lifestyle begins to wear a little thin. Your tired of people walking out of your life quicker than they walked in. You have to ask the question to yourself every day why your not longer lasting material. So you stop, you enjoy the other aspects of your life, burying this reputation that was drowning you with regret and you get on with things. Until one day a rumour is said about you, and for once in your life you know it's not true. But the people around you don't. The banter starts again except this time, you know in your heart your being judged for the person you use to be. 

So who gets to judge this person? Someone who doesn't have as much as a past as hers? 

And why is it that we ourselves believe in change, that we can change who we use to be and yet we can't trust that others than change themselves. What makes us any different from other people? If an absolute player decides to change his or her ways, can anyone other than himself really believe him?

I use to think action speaks louder than words. But no ones really been looking, nobody's noticed the person I left behind and the person I want to be. 

So for now, I'll carry on with my life, and I hope to make up my own mind about people rather than judge them on past experiences because the word hypocrite comes to mind.

Whose the more insecure sex?

The answer must be us females right? We're constantly striving for perfection, whether is be in career, body or love. We want the perfect boyfriend, house, job and social life. Without one would make us a lesser person.

At least thats what were fed in the magazine industry anyway.

See for me, I'm pretty content with myself. I am an ordinary girl that has her moments of chubby anxiety and career worries, but apart from that Im rather collected when it comes to the single scene.

A few things has happened to me though that makes me question just how secure the opposite sex feels about themselves. A few (not all) guys i've met these past few months have filled up my mobile inbox with messages unread or unanswered, and yet they still text. 

Back in the day wasn't it the girl that was waiting for the guy to call or text? These days I'm complaining how much a guy is paying attention to me rather than the opposite.

Now don't make me out to be some sort of egotistical goddess. I am sure there are some girls out there who have without a doubt been through what i've been through, and I'm nothing special.

Meeting a guy for the first time should be exciting, the possibility of a few dates and getting to know someone should be all butterflies. And yet recently I don't even reach the first date because I'm bored of them cramming up I'm o2 bill already.

Maybe it's me, maybe I am a commitment phobic. With my past record it's no surprise I think little of the opposite sex. One of my ex's actually pretended to have broken up with his girlfriend to be with me, only for me to discover her belongings in "his apartment." Rather than lurk in the shadows I confronted the girl and turns out they never broke up. Funnily enough last  I heard of them there engaged. 

The ex however, was so insecure that his girlfriend was cheating on him, that he went off and did the same. Although he discovered that the rumours were true, he still couldn't bear to be by himself. He needed the trophy wife along with his other materialistic possessions so he could feel secure in life. 

I guess we're all just as bad as each other.

My snobbery of Essex once again.

So I'm on Facebook, which is no surprise since this will always be on a daily basis.

And I come across this facebook group "Who's up for a Silent Disco?" (Essex)

The group is basically about having a Silent Disco in the Essex region, which made me laugh at loud. Im sorry but Silent Disco's have been around for YEARS. They are a quality concept and what? Essex has only just realised it might be a good idea?

One of the many reasons I move back to Southampton. The Essex nightlife is like taking your parents out to the cinema. You don't want to be seen out with them, your not that fussed about the film but it's something to kill the time.

Of course I'm not suggesting that Southampton is the number one place to be. But it is a damn sight better than Essex if you want a cheap GOOD night out. Being in Essex makes me try and drink myself into an oblivion only to be pissed off because there's no decent music to dance to. Don't even get me started on Mayhem.

I guess in Essex your clubbing days are over the day you turn 18. Yes I see the irony in that, but we all know the skirts that flaunt around the Essex nightlife are barely legal, and funnily enough look at YOU like you should be tucked up in bed watching Coronation Street.

Come to Southampton my lovers. Decent music is at your doorstep, granted there are still a bunch of unsocialites roaming the street, but you'll be pushed to find somewhere that doesn't have the odd bloke trying to smash a glass in your face.

Love..

So here I am ready to give up on the male specimen and EVEN join match.com when I get a few friend requests and two messages from friends of friends of friends and a complete stranger complementing me on my profile picture.

Can men just smell the vunerability and neediness of women? Or is it just a coincidence that one more example of my pathetic love life and I'll be writing spinster myself on my gravestone.


I'm not bitter just annoyed with the rest of the world needing one another.

Music

It's funny how your music taste changes.

When I was 14 I couldn't STAND the likes of r'n'b, d'n'b and anything else with a comma and B in. As long as the lyrics were giving the two fingers up to the world and it had a guitar in it. I liked.


Not much has changed, my heart will forever hold a torch for Blink 182. That band got me through my anxious teenage years.

But music for me now consists of two loves. Number one lies in the songs relating to the people in my life. If I'm missing my Irish friend whose travelled to Australia, I'll play some Keri Hilson. Not because of the lyrics or the genre of music but because it was played when we were together, in a happy time in our lives.

Number two though consists of my own tiny head space of music. There are just some songs that make my own time stand still, were there are no thoughts, no feelings, just music. These are the songs I treasure the most. No matter what cringey genre or band follows, these songs are ones to be listened to when your at that point in your life were things are trying to tug you all in different directions when all you want to do is sit and listen.

Josh Groban- Your still you. This song I heard while watching an episode of Ally Mcbeal and I was MESMERISED. To the point I forgot to breathe just because I wanted to soak up every note he hit. The song itself feels like a euphoric disney dream, and the lyrics I hope I will feel so much for someone like that one day.

Lifehouse- You and Me

Creed- With Arms Wide Open. Okay so the guy got addicted to paracetmol but the song itself is something of a beauty.

Incubus- Dig.

Gavin de Graw- I Don't Wanna Be. His lyrics really relate to that stage in my life right now.

That's it for now.